Who is Stuart Jacobson?

Tittie Bars And Beer

YOU’RE DOING WHAT?

Tuesday, November 11th, 2008

With the economy tanking and more and more young ladies being fired from their full time jobs, many tittie bars around the country are experiencing a surge of promising new strippers looking for work. While an ailing economy brings fewer customers to local strip clubs, it often will bring out more women willing to give pole dancing a try.

And that is what happened to Michelle. She’s 29 year old and eight weeks ago fired from her accounting job. With a condo, a mortgage, property taxes, college loans, car payments, health club membership, utilities, food, clothing, entertainment, and her addiction to red wine, it was urgent Michelle find work.

I jokingly suggested becoming a stripper. After all, all summer long emceeing biker shows, I’ve gotten to know strippers earning potential - and it’s a lot more than being an accountant.

So Michelle called a strip club sixty miles away from her downtown condo. Most adult entertainers work as independent contractors, meaning they pay club owners a fee to perform and then keep the money they earn from tips and private dances. Because it doesn’t cost club owners extra cash to take on new dancers, club managers lose nothing by adding more women to their dance roster.

Michelle called me today. She just celebrated one month at her new job. She’s still uneasy that she’ll run into someone she knows - but she’s taking home more money than ever before. And it’s cash! None of her friends know she’s dancing naked to support her lifestyle and she’s turned on by the secret. She said she’ll dance 6 more months and then look for another accounting job.

Yea right! That’s as likely as my friend Mal never complaining about his soon-to-be wife Sharron.

Tags: Strip clubs, strippers

Posted in Humor, Sex | 10 Comments »

Don’t over-analyze it Dr. Phil

Monday, April 7th, 2008

Here is the reason men go to strip clubs!

Strip clubs are a $5-billion dollar industry in the US. The reason I bring this up is because my friend Norm just got busted by his wife for going to the Admiral theatre to see young, beautiful, and sexy girls parading naked on stage. His wife Lisa was so angry that she threatened to stop doing his laundry if he went one more time. Not a strong enough threat in the world of men going to strip clubs!

Here are the facts. A strip club to a man is what a shoe store is to a woman; NECESSARY! When a man walks into this semi-dark, out-of-the-way paradise, he finds “freedom-from –strife” from his wife and family for the hour he’s in his sanctuary of female nakedness. In other words, Norm felt like a man again. I know Lisa and she is a wonderful woman, but she forgets Norm needs “hero worshipping.” But at the Admiral theatre that evening Norm felt like Tom Cruise at a Scientology rally and that is why men go to strip clubs. I bet Abe Lincoln didn’t deny himself of this essential excursion.

Tags: Abe Lincoln, Admiral Theatre, Dr. Phil, Strip clubs, tittie bars

Posted in Humor, Sex, Sociology | 4 Comments »